el architino

Postby el architino » Mon Oct 06, 2003 12:19 pm

"POP ARCHITECT" now that ideas my copyright so if there are any tv execs from endemol then get in touch


nonsence, EL ARCHITINO has been making this show for weeks already. its concept similar to the derren brown show, in which teams from anthoney reddy and zoe developmnets are forced to play russian roulete with each other in an abandoned basement.
POP!
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Derren Brown

Postby pepe » Mon Oct 06, 2003 12:57 pm

el archintino.

that show was pants
he chickened out on chamer number 5!
how was it a success.

I say fill all six chambers

irish roullette!


Or get david blaines box (with whoever you want inside) and dangle it over the liffey and then drop it in.


P.S

I want to publish a book of your cartoons.
pleae get in touch
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Postby el architino » Mon Oct 06, 2003 1:17 pm

EL ARCHITINO is in the process of making his own show "EL ARCHITINO plays russian roulete live on tv" it consits of EL ARCHITINO in his white suede suit, surrounded by she-males playing at a roulette table in moscow. the show will be broadcast live for one hour with no sound. the last 2 minutes will cosist of derren brown being tied up sat on the roulette wheel, spun around and then set on fire.

EL ARCHITINO would like to remind you that the images he presents free of charge on this website are not cartoons. they are created using a sophisticated combination of various 3d visualisation programs, overlay plug ins and photographic packages.

despite EL ARCHITINO's vast wealth, he does not have any legitimate copies of these programmes. the publishing of his images would leave him open to massive fines by computer companies (which EL ARCHITINO could easily afford).

also, as EL ARCHITINO's designs are prohibitably complex and subtle, the potential audience would not be sufficient.
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el architino

Postby pepe » Mon Oct 06, 2003 1:25 pm

The complex 3d programs and overlay plugins.

are they the top secret new softwre produced by "bic"

the new prototype of "biro" software developed in collaboration with the aliens contained at area 51

if so we are on to you as this software has not been released onto the open market yet.

whilst we will deny that there was any breach in our security, we acknowledge that your designs appear to be created with our technology.

As such we have recetly launched our fleet of ufo's and are attempting to locate your omnipresence

We are not far behind you. but your so damn airy

so keep moving.

C.I.A.N.A.S.A.

CIANARA
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Postby el architino » Mon Oct 06, 2003 1:28 pm

EL ARCHITINO is speachless.....
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“biro-releasev2024”

Postby pepe » Mon Oct 06, 2003 3:49 pm

following the ddda continued denials of the existence of the 3W cult and without the neccessary supernatural powers neccessary to make contact with them.

Althpugh many mediums/phsychics and mid readers were used in attempt to speak to the founders of the cult. After 10 years of unsuccesful attempts. The ddda reviewed schemes submitted in 2003. The now globablly famous imposter design was ressurected after a resurgence of spinning tops and their subsequent rise up the toy charts to become the childrens no.1.

This return to simplicity and the significance of the spinning top occured after The Sony Playstation and all other virtual reality games having been outlawed after it was revealed that Sony were deliberately brainwashing the youth of today with constant images of a violent and sexual nature.

The imposters Tower was the victim of the most savage “biro” attack ever seen. Alledgedy the work of el arcitino. Whose development of the illicit software allowed him to remove all the twisting structures structural columns with one swipe accross his three dimensional graphics tablet. The resulting collapse of the tower was the “original” cause of the 4th World War.

Following forensic analysis of the BDCH tower it was noted that 3 sets of human remains were to be found in the concrete floor slabs, subsequent dan aalysis identified these as those of the three leaders of the 3w cult

the images below were found in the 2U inc vaults in the dusty and debris fillled basement
of the BDCH tower. they were discovered after travelling forward into time 2024 1 hour before the ill fated tower collapsed. The complex structural integrity security of the now trademarked libeskind "slurry walls" being installed as standard in every building provided an air pocket around the "vault"


also found within the vault were 2 brown envelopes one containing strange note 100 denomination believed to be legal currency of the European Union (now known as the Global Union) and another containing contact details for the leaders of the 3W cult

however upon investigation of the building in London indicated in the envelope there were no signs of the cults headquaters. only a hairdressing salon run by a selection of ejected members of the DodgyDealingDevelopmentAuthority board.

El Architino was subesquently caputured and held at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, but with the combined efforts of the kidnapped magicians Darren Brown and David Blaine he managed to convince the authorities that the now aged convicts there would be better served by a new and radical casino development based on his rejected design for the U2Tower competition.

The casino featured all previous national versions of roullete, within a global community of like minded souls.

one member of the reformed rock band 2U was said to have a kind fondness for antarctic roullete, which involves sitting naked on a block of ice and spinning round and round continuosly until you become so dizzy that you slip into the surrounding jacuzzi

The bidding for work on this project involved so many corporate dinners that el arcitino took over the McDonalds Corporation to provide food for his workforce.

His original sketch sold for a record sum at Christies, eclipsing the combined value of alll other works of arts produced in the history of human culture.

“YOU HAVE TO LAUGH”
“OTHERWISE YOU GET ANGRY”

became the most popular television show in the history of the world. A global network of sattelites broadcast 24 hours a day, featuring el architino rollin dubies on the beach in barbados and drinknin mojitos prepared by his business partner pepe.
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el architino

Postby pepe » Mon Oct 06, 2003 6:01 pm

email me
we need to have a proper chat in private!
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Postby el architino » Tue Oct 07, 2003 10:31 am

EL ARCHITINO is not in the habit of emailing strangers, what with all those paedophiles around masquerading as architects in chat rooms.
EL ARCHITINO's I.T. dept. suggest you contact them through EL ARCHITINO's profile on this site.
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E mails to el Architino

Postby Sebastian Ober » Tue Oct 07, 2003 1:07 pm

since arriving in ireland two years ago i have found it very extremely difficult not only to make friends but also to find a job in a progressive architectural firm. I have seen many of el architino's projects built and unbuilt in many of the many El croquis magazines i have purchased. Since being in Ireland i Have consumed approx 15,000 litres of beer. If architino would be so generously kind and forward his e MALE to me i could apply for a job in his office, working on the entry for his project in eygpt, which i found was very reminisent of the work of the great Nazi architect Spheer, who was one of the fatherlands greatest.

1000 thank yous to you el architino you have made this pathetic young man very happy
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Postby what? » Tue Oct 07, 2003 1:27 pm

empty
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Postby el architino » Tue Oct 07, 2003 1:28 pm

EL ARCHITINO is always on the look out for young fresh blood to invigorate his tremendous practice (this is not to suggest for one second that EL ARCHITINO's finger is ever anywhere but firmly on the pulse).

EL ARCHITINO has made it clear that young sebastian may embody the charecteristics EL ARCHITINO seeks in his workers: the ability to type on a keyboard and blind aligence to a megolamaniac (used in the most positive sense of the word).

if young sebastian, or any other like minded subordinants wish to work for EL ARCHITINO email his IT dept at: ELARCHITINO@hotmail.com

a portfolio of images of childhood drawings of EL ARCHITINO with certificates of authenticity and a 203 word essay on the topic "the world without EL ARCHITINO" should be added.
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Postby sw101 » Tue Oct 07, 2003 2:31 pm

The world without el architino

Swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan swan

El end
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Postby el architino » Tue Oct 07, 2003 2:44 pm

in spite of EL ARCHITINO's massive abilities to percieve and understand, the meaning of this message from sw101 perplexes him somewhat.
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Postby Mrs. M. J. Lister » Wed Oct 08, 2003 8:04 pm

people beware,
do not be fooled by 'el architino' if that is even there real name........
can you not see behind the mask?, 'el architino' is a fraud, can you not see that the drawings they put forward as work of their own hand are merly cad drawing converted using Squiggle®, [ http://www.secondsourceuk.com/squiggle.htm ] if you are interested to in true works of art from the pen on the web, may i direct you to http://www.biro-web.com .
yours,
Mrs. M J Lister
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Mrs Lister

Postby pepe » Wed Oct 08, 2003 9:32 pm

i find it offensive that you do not see the true value of 'el architinos' original artworks.
ad i believe you will be hearing from his legal department regarding your comments
his drawings are not produced using this imposter software, as a trained eye or the certificate of authenticity will prove.
i recently had one of my originals valued by david dickinson and he said it was definitely a bargain!

as for biro-web.com

these are not works of art,
anynone can see that the level of craftsmenship developed by el architno eclipses these doodles, whilst also containing magical ideas that make us all smile

there is no value that you can put on happiness

i sugggest you take your squiggles and continue to search for an abode.

you wandering homeless person!
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Postby el architino » Thu Oct 09, 2003 10:38 am

EL ARCHITINO would like to make it public knowledge that mrs lister is a crack whore.

although this has been known to EL ARCHITINO for quite some years now, he is not one to gossip. however, when mrs lister tries to belittle a man of EL ARCHITINO's social standing and intellectual genius, he was brought past the limits of indifference.

mrs lister (EL ARCHITINO is very surprised you are now married) spent much of the 80's and early 90's selling tail and chicken head to feed her crack addiction (EL ARCHITINO has had first hand experience of these matters when he worked for a brief time as an undercover detective, in a similar veign to james bond).

EL ARCHITINO is sorry that it has come to this but mrs lister has forced it into the public domain through her own actions.

EL ARCHITINO will also be sueing mrs lister and her new family into a situation that they will all revert to being crack whores. also the pathetic sites of squiggle and biro web will soon be insinuated in a child porn ring and shut down.

good day.
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keep smiling :)

Postby pepe » Thu Oct 09, 2003 11:09 am

and pass that doubie

it is very rare to find someone of el architino's stature who whilst normally good natured and kind, will persecture someone. but its damn funny

see you on O'connor st mrs lister

I'll be wearing a pair of "the fly" sunglasses and will have my prostheric microphone attatched to my left hand.

drink them dry
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Postby el architino » Thu Oct 09, 2003 12:59 pm

obviously EL ARCHITINO's scheme would join these two. EL ARCHITINO has taken the liberty of redesigning his scheme in light of the discrepencies in the morals of the DDDA.

always one to push the limits of architectural theory, technology and to question the role of architecture in society today, EL ARCHITINO feels that this tower has latent potential that has gone unrecognised by most entrants and the unambitious DDDA/U2 collaberation.

EL ARCHITINO now proposes a platinum statue of himself equivalent to 345 stories in height which will straddle the mouth of the river liffey. EL ARCHITINO is aware of the original height restrictions of the competition but feels that the organisers are sniffiling peasents and has opted to disregard their guidlines for site, height and progam.

EL ARCHITINO's QS deartment have informed him that a solid platinum statue of this size may be beyond the budget of the scheme and advised EL ARCHITINO to reconsider. EL ARCHITINO has fired his entire QS department for their insolence.

EL ARCHITINO feels that this project will be a welcome addition to the skyline of dublin and the surrounding counties.
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Postby el architino » Thu Oct 09, 2003 1:01 pm

a photomontage render of scheme as seen from o'connell bridge
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Postby Sebastian Ober » Thu Oct 09, 2003 1:28 pm

El architino our gracious and most kind over lord, the subtle way in which your schemes dominate the city is very impressive. I know that if your entry came to be realised, it would improve the overall sense of well being of the people of the city. Daily sacrifices could be held at the base of the statue to make sure that the overlord is pleased. small animals at first, Pigeons,rats etc. could be used , then slowly the people would realise that the only true way to please the overlord would be by offering up the lives of other architects throughtout the world who not only Question el leader but also find him a threat to their daily lives and petty existance.

Heil EL architino there can be only one.
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exhibition

Postby pepe » Thu Oct 09, 2003 1:35 pm

pepe would like to inform el architino that the exhibition of entries opened over an hour ago and that he should (as guest of honour) be supping the wine and working his magic on the lovely ladies.

we all acknowledge tht el archintino as executive producer of "pop architect" as directed by pepe will have his own scheme included in the proceedings. and will of course be the winner!

beating the other schemes including those proposed by mr fog

but we deny that any impropriety has occured on the parts of pepe or el architino and that whilst the schemes have already been published the anonymity of the competitors wil be of paramount importance.

and that the judging process will be held in a topsecret location (abandoned basement) and the panel will be made up of darren brown,david blaine and paul daniels.

We have thus been unable to contact uri geller but obviously once we do lacate hium he will be the chairman of the jury.

we will not pay the jury for their time, but we will offer them a magicians circle to be located as a halo floating above the statues head.
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Postby el architino » Thu Oct 09, 2003 3:54 pm

EL ARCHITINO, being the gracious leader that he is, thaks sebastian and pepe for their kind (yet obvious) words.

heil EL ARCHITINO indeed....
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Postby gensler » Fri Oct 10, 2003 1:53 pm

I have awoken and now can see the luminesence emenating from the toes of El Architino. I beg of you oh lord please show your glorious feet to the world. let them all bask in the glories that are your toenails.[IMG]peacefulprotest-091003bwe.jpg[/peacefulprotest-091003bwe.jpgIMG]
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Postby Darcy » Fri Oct 10, 2003 4:01 pm

Imagine the relief and joy( in the past but born posthumously) upon discovering the consolidation of wayward intellectual force in this one place*. The beautiful fusion of one mans unquestionable thirst for world domination, and the collective will of a gathering of those who seek to cease with abandon the half truths and folly despite the imminent and real threat reality promises to their pusuit, who see the truth in one called to lead in an age of faceless shallowness and semi nomadic stillsuits (although the stillsuits are usefull for recovering up to 30% of body moisture). No my real draw to this forum is to hail an observed rejection of an all too common ugly obsession with the "biro" so lauded here by the good Mr Lister.
My message to the gentleman concerned would be not to let the bright lights of the brilliance dazzle your vision of "El Architino's" talent.My only fear for you is that your argument for the conspiracy came before MY analysis, The flaw in your historians is that you'll never leave well enough alone. You see true nobility and in the true geneology of a pauper you must append a cynical footnote, pity on you. I cannot persuade you, its something some will never understand, but sometimes the true light of something only crystalises in the sharp contrast of another single view. Atreides lost something essential to his humanity when learned to call the truth heresy, beware the same fate. Make a captive messiah, and you run the risk of creating a martyr .
P.S. Sebastian didn't I meet you in the Phoenix park one night ?
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Postby el architino » Fri Oct 10, 2003 4:57 pm

the insights of this darcy charecter are indeed adept, yet not as sharp as those of the rap magazine xxl. no sooner had EL ARCHITINO suggested in one of his interviews with reuters that he will be releasing a rap album, than this magazine had EL ARCHITINO hailed as the "next big thing" in rap music and emblazened on the cover.
of course EL ARCHITINO shall be the next big thing. yet this is just a small step on EL ARCHITINO's path to world domination.

word.
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